(38) Love and Lust

Exodus 20:14

• Do not commit adultery

The Seinfeld episode called The Good Samaritan has a scene with George and a married woman he had a sexual encounter with.  In the scene George gets upset because he can't believe he has just committed adultery.  She comforts him by saying, "You didn't commit adultery. I did." This is not taking away from the comedic genius of the show or trying to say that watching Seinfeld is a sin or whatever before anyone thinks that.  This was just to show that this example attitude of sexual activity shows our ignorance of what sexual sin is.  Old Jewish law does back up what she said.  The woman commits adultery.  But is the man okay when this happens?  No.  He was considered part of the problem.  Notice another command was

Exodus 20:17 (c)

• Do not covet your neighbor's wife

George did wrong as well.  Therefore when a sexual activity happens outside of marriage both parties are wrong.

So what about two people who aren't married at all?  No adultery by definition is committed then.  This is where you have to read between the lines.  Perhaps one day the people will be married.  If the woman has already slept with another man, that man is not her husband.  When she marries, it will be adultery.  It is the same with the man.  Once he marries he already has coveted.  Even if they never get married, the act itself should be implied to be wrong, just based on principle.  So the idea that you can have sex as long as you never get married would just be a rationalization.

In the New Testament Jesus even adds on to the law by saying that even if a man looks at a woman with lust in his heart, he has committed adultery.  How can it be simpler than that?

Having sexual feelings and thoughts are normal.  And the feeling itself is not wrong.  The thought will enter and that is not wrong.  But when the thought becomes more than just a thought as Jesus said it becomes sin.  Paul also states that we need to take every thought into captivity.  If the thought grows it becomes sin of the heart and may even lead to sin against humanity.  Other forms of wrong sexual activity are:  incest, bestiality, masturbation, groping, fondling, homosexuality, bisexuality, non-marital oral (yes, Bill, oral), pornography, petting, fornication, and coveting.  But do not miss this point...all forms of sexual activity outside of marriage is not appropriate, that includes even two consenting heterosexual adults even if they have been together for 30 years.  None is any worse than the other.  And even though none of us would really admit it, we all have done it one way or another.

Many people will not agree with this lesson.  And it isn't fun to hear because sexual activity is so prominent on our lives.  And perhaps out of all sins, it is the most fun.  But maybe that is also why satan uses this one to distort the truth more then the rest.  We tend to laugh when a TV show has an 80 year old woman "getting it on" with a man who is not her husband.  We all write it off as though "well at least she is having fun".  Sure the words make us laugh but in reality it shouldn't.
For more understanding here are some lyrics from Bride called Same ol' sinner

Same ol' sinner
Wearing the chains
I get the same ol' sinner

I believe your lies, desire inside
The truth I know will hurt
Your devil-eyes, I can't deny
I know what lust is worth
The devil has a healthy appetite
Raped by fear in the fire tonight
He'll tell you it's love when it's only lust
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust

The point being behind this whole lesson is that the Bible says sex has its limits.  Sexual activity outside marriage is not appropriate.  But why?  Sexual activity shows commitment.  Commitment to one person is an analogy to commitment to one God.  It is honorable and the right thing to do.